Step one: cut the lid off one box.
Step two: realise one of the toddlers has taken off their pants. Decide it’s unimportant.
Step three: cut off the lid from the other box.
Step four: remove one toddler from powerpoint area.
Step five: move sharp knife away from the edge of the bench where you left it when you went to retrieve powerpoint child.
Step six: realise your coffee has gone cold already.
Step seven: let the kids play with the beds until naptime, when you will paint them out of the way of prying eyes, fingers, and someone upsetting the cup of water.
Step eight: watch the younger toddler copy everything the older toddler does, including kissing the dolly good night. Decide you have the cutest children in all the land, and all must be made aware of it.
Step nine: Put on a load of washing and tidy up in the four minutes you’ve got left to get stuff done before they get bored of the activity.
Step ten: microwave your coffee.
Step eleven: trip over one of the beds that a kid has left directly next to your feet and gone to play with something else.
Step twelve: when kids are asleep, bust out the paint set. Get busy trying to get it all done before they wake up.
Step thirteen: kids wake up early and will not take no for an answer when they want to paint.
Step fourteen: sigh. 
By all means let them paint the beds yourself, if you can stand that sort of thing. I was a bit selfish and wanted to get my paint on.
Step fifteen: Leave to dry overnight. The beds, not the kids. The kids are gonna need a bath.
Step sixteen: show to the kids, who think it is Christmas. Elder one says “Fank you very much, mummy! Oh it’s perfect!”
Step seventeen: that’s just something in your eye, don’t worry.
Dolly bed blankets:
You will need:
1 x 100g 8ply yarn (or two balls if you are doing different colours/edges). I used Panda Magnum soft.
5mm hook
Pattern:
Blanket: Chain 41.
Row 1: dc in each chain to end. Ch 1, turn.
Row 2: dc in each stitch to end. Ch 1, turn. Repeat 22 more times (for a total of 24 rows). Feel free to make it longer if you need to, depending on dolly bed size.
Border: Just before the corner, attach new yarn. Sl st in first stitch, hdc in next stitch, three dc in corner stitch, hdc in next, sl st.
Continue around the blanket: sl st, hdc, three dc, hdc, sl st. This will create a little wave.
decoration: I always use this flower pattern. For everything. Can’t help it! But feel free to improvise.
Realise eventually they’re probably going to need a proper dolly bed, and so buy a lovely handmade second-hand one from a lady on Gumtree. Wrap it up for Christmas. Throw out the cardboard ones when the PAINT FLAKES OMG get too much to handle 😉
Step 22- Manage to not only be a legendary, eco-friendly, child-memory giving, artsy-farstsy DIY trail blazing cool mamma…but ALSO manage to somehow document it (hilariously as always might I ad- love getting my LMAO on at the Veggie Mamma) all for digital posterity.
*Phemie ponders DIY dog toys for her fur babies- realises she’s
not creative enough and would probably have to learn to use power tools (they are ridgebacks)-
…lucky they seem to be relatively happy terrorising the garden for free- thats eco friendly right?*
Haha I wonder if this blog will still be around when my kids are older and I read back about how ridiculous it all was 🙂
OMG Stacey too cute they are the sweetest little girls and I know why you had something in your eye,when did Pepper start being a big girl “sob” for you xx
They’re the best! Such big kids 🙂
Love this! And love Gumtree!
We got some great op shopped Christmas gifts for the girls yesterday!! $5 for a talking Little People Zoo with 12 animals and 4 people! 🙂 Winning!
Nailed it! I bought a little doll high chair too. and some My Little Ponies!
Ha ha…I love it!
I had help making a pie last night…it took SO many steps.
No matter…the pie was delicious!
I am SO sad about the pie.
Too funny! Love seeing your two play together.
Me too, they’re the cutest!
Also, when you cardboard-creative make it yourself, it’s not a big deal when it ends up broken/in the trash. Excellent way to keep a hold of the clutter!
Or if mum paints it really ugly colours.
I was just thinking that later today I would blog about my daughters ‘mini mama’ stage and her doll bed! is it ok if I link this? That crochet blanket is adorable… I’m thinking a two year old, or mid twenty year old size might be happening in this house.
Oh for sure, go right ahead! (if you haven’t already). Linking is fun 🙂
Staying on the theme of dollies, Marlo use to love to bath the dolls!I just used an icecream container and heaps of washing IP liquid and she loved it!
I did that when I was a kid!
Im actually howling with laughter as i read this …… so perfectly deadpan but sonehow just nailed it…….
Kids eh?!