The other day, I was reading an article about problems British people have when interacting with their fellow man.
I could not stop laughing.
If you’ve got all the time in the world, you can read the original reddit thread, but there’s something about seeing those quotes superimposed on funny pictures that just made it 100x better. I realised, due to my intense social awkwardness and my penchant for tea, that I could pass for British any day. Well, that and my extensive knowledge of the British Royal Family. I could be putting my brain to good use but instead I’m knowing which palaces belong to whom, and that Diana used to eat dinner in bed a lot.
I could relate to so many of these – do they sound familiar to you too?!
“Not to worry” – Meaning: I’m bitterly disappointed and it’s all your fault
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) July 24, 2014
The horror: “How about we just order a bit of everything and share?” — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) July 28, 2014
Making a terrible cup of tea and wondering how to live with yourself — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 1, 2014
“That’s certainly one way of looking at it” – Translation: That’s certainly the wrong way of looking at it — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) July 19, 2014
Watching with quiet sorrow as someone makes you a different sandwich to the one you ordered
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) April 23, 2014
“Each to their own” – Translation: You’re wrong, but never mind — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) June 20, 2014
The quiet shame of failing to open a bus window
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) June 6, 2014
Someone not hearing you when you say hello, so just abandoning any plan of further conversation — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) June 2, 2014
Never feeling more uncomfortable than when instructed to “make yourself at home” — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) April 10, 2014
I am heading to Twitter to follow these guys right now. I am British and live in America and these are hilarious! ‘Each to their own’….exactly!
“Just shut up now please” hahaa
So funny. Years ago I had the pleasure of living in America for a bit where I met my friend Louise. Lou was very British and was all of the above. She used to marvel at my Australian-ness as I came into her house and made us both a cup of tea cause she was feeding the baby – no sense in waiting, right? Well, that and my straight up opinionated opinions on everything. And I would never stand by and let someone make me a sandwich that I hadn’t ordered – the horro of that! We were like chalk and cheese but that’s probably why we were friends, she admired my boldness and I loved her quiet grace.
I love how they’re silently apoplectic at the display of impolite behaviour
Oh shit, order a bit of everything & share + bus window = worst nightmare
“Make yourself at home” fuuuuuuck
what…pants off and feet on your coffee table?
Oh so brilliant. I raise my cup of tea to them.
Same!
Hahahaha – I have tears! I think I need to go live in the UK now though…I feel like it would be delightful to live amongst so many other socially awkward people.
Everyone would get out of your way and then hold the door open for you!
And then a round of awkward apologies / thank you’s would ensue. But not before I’d had a chance to get anxious about how long I was taking to get to the door.
Oh there was one I missed about saying goodbye to someone and then both having to walk in the same direction to leave. So awkward
Oh my gaaawwwwd! That literally happened to me 2 days ago – had just finished having a coffee date with a guy, said goodbye & then we both started walking in the same direction. Obviously I veered off and crossed the road to reduce awkwardness.
Oh my goodness when I lived there it was so funny how completely unwilling the Brits were to cause a stir. In our organization people were using a fridge they weren’t supposed to and the catering were having to run around as a result. A German assistant sent out an org wide email saying, “The fridge is for catering, don’t use it. Thanks in advance.” and got called in by her British boss who said – in the UK – one must at least put a paragraph or two ahead of that and say how lucky we are to have this fridge, and how grateful we are for catering, etc. etc. blah blah… and then (and still not so bluntly) say the point of the email. My German friend was like, “Yeah, someone else is going to have to write those.” Ha.
Haha one must be mindful of others’ feelings! I am super incapable of telling someone they’ve got my order wrong, or I don’t like it. I don’t want to put THEM out, or make them feel uncomfortable!
Much to my husband’s dismay… I’m super incapable of holding it in 🙂
I hate that agonised second where you know they’re super-embarrassed! Can’t do it.
i think i am a bit like the German person in this story… but mostly i hide the shy by being incredibly LOUD!
Not sure if i am proud or ashamed of this…
Love this, thanks for sharing and the laugh. I was born in the UK but grew up in Australia with an English Mum & Australian Dad – quite a bit of “each to their own” and “that’s one way of looking at it”going on with a pot of tea solving all problems. Find myself doing the same now!
So diplomatic! It makes me laugh 🙂
“Cup of tea” apparently sounds too much like “cappuccino” haha love it!
Oh I know, that cracked me up! I landed in LA and asked for a large tea. They gave me coffee.
“Someone not hearing you when you say hello, so just abandoning any plan of further conversation” Gold! Happens to me at least once a week :/
Haha I feel like such a goose, too.
Love these! I can completely relate, especially the “How about we order a bit of everything and share?”
They remind me of Socially Awkward Penguin (another one I can relate to!)
Hilarious! I am Royal Family fan too and won bonus points at the Kinder Trivia Night for naming the ten people in line to the British throne … in order! x
OMG V!!
So funny because it’s true.
Tea and books would be my perfect any day. Too bad for everyone else 😛
Oh thank you for sharing that – it was awesome! I realize I do have a little bit of british inside me too!
In the spirit of balance, can I point out that not all of us as quite this polite? …. Or know that much about the Royal Family … seriously love, where did you even get that mug?!? lol
Haha of course, nothing would be half as funny without extreme sterotyping. sounds like the Very British Problems twitter guy uses the same lame attempt at comedy I do 😉