I remember it very clearly. It was about five years ago, and I was putting on my makeup for work. Well, at least I was trying to, when I noticed that the creases in my cheek from my pillow still hadn’t smoothed out, and I’d been up for nearly an hour.
“Oh my goddddddd”, I half-wailed to my husband. “My faaaaace doesn’t bounce back any more! It’s the beginning of the end!”. Nothing if not dramatic. I think I even heard him rolling his eyes.
I had dealt with the grey hairs at 25. The “smile lines” (such bullshit, I didn’t even smile until I was 19, just ask my mum), the weird pigment issues, all the bits and pieces that come with being a grown up. But losing collagen? Well, that stuff’s hard to replace. Just ask anyone who’s had a facelift.
I love getting older. Life absolutely kicked ass at age 30, and it only gets better. I actually give less of a fuck about things (including wrinkles, believe it or not), and am as secure in my too-skinny-yet-strangely-wobbly body as I can be at this stage. I’m a happy girl, content with her world.
Which is why it is so interesting to see my body is beginning its ever-so-slight decline. Just as it’s meant to. Skin no longer bounces back, and is starting to get thin on my face and neck. When I’m sitting in the middle of the night patting Pepper with my head on my hand, I notice the effect of gravity GIVING ME THE BEGINNINGS OF JOWLS. Thanks, genetics. Nobody lives forever, our physical vessels begin to take more effort to care for, and your face starts sliding down to meet your chest. Which has already slid down to meet your stomach.
All very normal, yes. Skin is meant to start breaking down in your mid-20s, which you apparently don’t see until your mid-30s (hi). Your bones need extra help from your mid-30s, your teeth start their decline in your 40s, your internal organs from 50 onwards. We shrivel, we shrink, our knees creak, and we can’t run on two hours’ sleep and three cups of coffee any more. Hell, I don’t even want to.
If I ever remembered to drink the required amount of water every day, I probably wouldn’t have a face that’s falling off my head right now. I’d probably need these a lot sooner though.
When did you start noticing you ain’t what you used to be? Did you hate it, or figure it had to happen sometime? (that’s very zen of you, give us some pointers!)
I remember the day I got real cellulite. Starting at about age 16 I had imaginary cellulite and I would spend hours staring at in the mirror and considering what I could do to get rid of it. But then I got real cellulite. And it is with me still…keeping my bum and thighs company all day, every day!
And if it is any consolation, I was looking at photos this weekend and I saw one of me from when C was about eight months old and I thought I looked young and fresh! At the time I hadn’t slept for eight months…so I don’t know what that says about my current state of haggardness. But I like you don’t really care. It is just a face.
haha it’s totally just a face. And nobody cares about it who looks at us anyway! Isn’t it crazy that we feel haggard and horrific, but we don’t look it to others. You certainly don’t strike me as haggard, you are gorgeous. If you catch me at the right angle, I look perfectly normal. Other times… whelp.
If I contort my arm in such a way, I see these weird arm wrinkles. It’s not a natural position to be in, so… Anyway. Here’s to hoping our eyesights soften just a little as our ageing bodies do.
yes! the arm wrinkles! the skin looks kind of… dehydrated. That’s half the reason I wanted to write this post, I don’t want crepey skin on my arms JUST yet. But apparently, that’s what I have.
Ha! I had the exact same pillow realisation. For a few months I even attempted to solely sleep on my back (which I hate). I’m 26 and have worse eye wrinkles than my husband who’s almost 31, thanks for nothing moisturiser. I started going grey at 24 or 25, whereas my husband was mostly grey when I met him, he was 21. I guess we’re even. I used to just pluck the grey hairs but now they’re coming in droves and I know that dreaded hairdresser’s appointment is looming. Boobs deflated and headed southward shortly after the birth of my kid. I very rarely wear make up and although it hides my brand new uneven pigmentation (not loving the red blotchiness), I find it gets stuck in my creases and now over-sized pores, creating some rather generous face trenches. Also, my once chubby hands are really veiny now, didn’t expect that. But probably my most annoying transformation has been the bags under my eyes. I appear as though i’m perpetually sleep-deprived. They could come in handy when I forget to take my re-usable tote bag to the markets though. Pretty sure I could fit a watermelon or two in there. Photo attached as evidence. Some days it really bothers me, I guess I didn’t expect to age so rapidly so young. But, I look back at photos of me 5+ years ago and think how young I looked. I know in 5+ years I will think the same about photos taken now.
haha that’s the same face I was pulling when someone snapped a shot and I went WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FACE? WHY IS IT SCRUNCHY LIKE THAT?! ARE THEY WRINKLES? WHEN DID I GET OLLLLLLD? And yet, you look lovely. Isn’t it funny that nobody really pays attention to our faces disintegrating before our very eyes, and think that we’re gorgeous, but we can see it and it’s unsettling. I almost had to pay excess baggage on our last overseas trip thanks to my eye suitcases. Gosh, wouldn’t some sleep be fucking amazing right now?
You don’t even look a little bit saggy! I think the most beautiful people are those who are past that young smooth dumb looking teenage stage! 🙂
You’re very kind, but I think maybe age has affected your eyesight? 😉
Its like every time I see a picture of myself in the last few years I wonder when I started to look like an over-stretched elastic band. I have these lines around my mouth where it looks like I drew them on. Nothing bounces back…we all talk about emotional resilience. Maybe I should have focussed on skin resilience too (I just went and got a glass of water while reading this…)
haha I was absentmindedly feeling my sunken cheek. Water is an excellent idea!
I can’t remember when I noticed I was ageing but I do know I had grey hair at age 23 when pregnant with my second baby- SO NOT COOL!!! It’s not even cool now that I’m about to turn 35 & is taking over the fron/top of my head ( it’s probably taking over the back of my head too but I can’t see so who cares right?!)
My skin is till reasonably ok-ish. I try & look after it best I can, drink lots of water blah blah blah but yeah I’m looking older but that’s cause I am! I have always been the girl who looked so much younger than I was ( 25 with two kids in tow & still getting asked for ID, that was me) so I sort of like I look my age now. God knows I don’t bloody act it most of the time!
What really gets me though is how old my body feels & looks. Yeah I’ve grown 3 humans & am currently growing a fourth but shit man my body is falling apart!!!! Wanna hear something gross? ( course you do) I have a varicous vein!!!! EEEEEEWWWWWW It’ just above my knee & it freaks me out! I’ve had spider veins for years ( working on your feet will do that to ya) but it’s just been the last few weeks that this revolting serpent like veing has decided to pop outta my skin. It’s like I’m bloody 60 or somthing 🙁 Add that to the constantly dicky back, groin muscle that keeps spasming, the fact I sometimes groan when trying to get up & that I’m nowere near as fit or flexible as I used to be & all signs point to old age. Am I Ok with it? Yeah mostly because it’s not a given that we get to age, grow old & show our life on our face so I’m grateful for that 🙂
Oh my gosh, I had one peeking ever-so-slightly on my thigh when I was pregnant with pepper. (I just uncrossed my legs, haha!). I had that funny groin muscle too, which made my leg collapse under me all the time! it was hilarious, especially in public. I do love getting older, but it’s certainly a period of adjustment when you realise your body is beginning to decline and one day I’m gonnna ddiiieeeeeeee
Thanks Stacey for letting me know my internal organs are on their way out too! Ageing sucks well the physical side of it does the grey hair though I used to be dark and can be a blonde now that’s one good point ,menopause kicks in you get a knee replacement or 2 ,yep it’s not pretty .I have pretty good skin for my age I think except when I accidentally turn my camera around to face me that is but I am happier in this older body. I don’t take crap from anyone and know what I like and what suits me and don’t do anything I don’t want to do so drink up your water petal I do a lot of that ,don’t hit the booze too hard and enjoy your crinkles and when I haven’t got my distance glasses on everything is in soft focus ,I don’t need reading glasses though, you got to love soft focus xx
Cannot wait for the soft focus! I will go and get some water right now.
This is really weird, but I always looked forward to getting a few fine lines. I always felt like my head was too old for my body, and when I was younger, I thought that when I get a few fine lines, I would be taken more seriously. Now I have them, and they are not so fine and they can stop now. X
Yeah I thought getting older would mean people wouldn’t just write me off as a know-it-all kid. Now they still do, but I’ve got a saggy face as well.
Hearin’ ya. It all hit me this year, bang on my 35th birthday. The saggy baggy eyes that don’t magically firm up as the morning progresses anymore, the greys, the achy bones…I’m in the process of (not) coming to terms with it. Hubby tells me I look the same as I did in my twenties, which is utter bullshit, but I love him for it. xx
haha Matt says I don’t look any different. And I”m like “so i’ve looked 50 my whole life? bugger.”
I’m noticing my skin just isn’t as bright any more. It’s hard to explain but my youthful glow has gone. I’m not noticing too many wrinkles yet though thank goodness!
I swear, I had pretty much none until last year. Then they all came out the woodwork. Bastards. Your skin is beautiful, like a dewy peach.
I swear I didn’t have lines around my eyes until my son came along. LOL. In a way though, they just kind of crept up on me. Since becoming a mum, I’ve never looked in the mirror less so when I do have a good old peer, i’m sometimes a bit suprised. Not as shocked as I thought I’d be though which is refreshing, being that I remember the hytsteria that used to accompany a single pimple appearing when I was in my late teens/early 20’s..
Yes! it’s like it creeps up on you. Then when you finally look in the mirror, you’re all HOLY SHIT, WHAT IS THAT?!
Getting older is fun on some levels but not so on others…… thankfully I only started getting the odd Grey at 36 and at almost 39 I still only have about a dozen or so but enough that I color my hair, I always said growing up I’d never have Grey hair lol……I guess I can thank my mum for good skin too, while I’ve got some pigmentation from not wearing sunscreen in my twenties it’s pretty good on the whole with just a few lines starting around the eyes which I mainly put down to having bub last year…… thankfully my skin still bounces back pretty well and is still quite firm, don’t hate me lol again I guess I have to thank my mum she’s 63yrs old soon and while her hair is very salt and pepper now she’s hardly got any lines at all.
Yeah I was really lucky, for ages I didn’t have anything. Now that I haven’t slept in a million years, my face is folding in on itself! Lucky you looking so firm and fancy! when you’re 80 you’ll still look totally young, haha x
they are not Depends, they are “panty liners”. 😉
for when your period is blue!
I’m only 23 and look 17 or 18. Very good cheek bones and decent, plump skin- thank you Cherokee Indian heritage. However, my son deflated my boobs, but it’s okay because they were too big anyways. Lol. Aging doesn’t scare me as much as time passing does. Love your post though!
haha I was so excited to have smaller boobs – but they’re not necessarily smaller, just completely deflated! I looked like a baby at 23 too. It was great!
I hate the fact that a saggy/aging face means you look like you have grumpy face. Lift my face and I looks heaps happy. Oh and younger
haha same. I have bitchy resting face, and everyone thinks I’m angry anyway. These between-eyebrows wrinkles make me look even madder. I’m not mad!
Naturally, I am late to the conversation because TOO MANY CHILDREN. But yes, I think I miss the collagen the most. Having a ‘babyish’ face all these years meant I have a bit more to spare but still, sometimes I touch the kids’ faces just to feel that collagen-rich push against my fingertips. Ping! It just snaps right back!
And the water! I am sure I look more haggard than I should because of the damn water I forget to drink.
I welcome ageing in terms of how I feel ABOUT myself but not necessarily how I feel in this actual body. Last week, I decided to show the kids how to do a cartwheel and TITS ON CHRIST, I thought I may have broken myself. Who knew you had to warm up before that shit?
I think I just broke a hip laughing! Holy shit, the thought of heaving this carcass in the general direction of a cartwheel is frightening. Although if I did, my sagging face might go back to where it’s meant to be when I’m upside down! I could be youthful again!
I’m so over the haggard look. What I wouldn’t give for some sleep. I’m going to go touch my children’s peachy faces and get jealous.
OMG this is hilarious! I too totally forget water and own some of those underwear items 🙁
Ah ageing – so elegant, huh?!
Wholeheartedly agree. I’m 35 and about 25 lbs overweight, and started a circuit-training class at the local rev center back in January. While I tend to be sore from specific exercises pretty regularly, I feel great and haven’t had a single random pain from movement or sleeping funny in over a month.